Your Iconic Appeal & Why it Matters


Many years ago, I was in desperate need of some inspiration.

I felt that there were two different versions of me:

Version One: The woman everyone saw
Version Two: The woman I desired to be (on the inside.)

It was an exhausting conflict.

Quite honestly, it made me feel like I was plain vanilla (not even vanilla bean!)

…..when I’m actually a sea salt caramel. With a top note of bergamot.

I was a chameleon, morphing myself to fit in at the cost of my own self-expression.

I held back my opinions.
I dressed in a way that wouldn’t get too much attention.
I didn’t make investments in things that I desperately desired.
I didn’t put myself out there.

It all boiled down to this:

I was hiding.

When you hide from life, life hides from you. {tweet it}

It’s not easy to put yourself out there and be ridiculed and rejected. Yet, everything we desire requires that we have the courage to do just that.

(So I did it. I stopped hiding. And guess what? As scary as it is, I’ve found that life becomes so much more fun and rewarding when you step out and make the world your runway, fully embodying the woman you desire to be. )

Alas, this wasn’t an overnight matter. It took some work.

I realized that I needed mentors that I could look up to, who didn’t hide. I wanted to know how to walk through my own world as a self-possessed, confident and inspiring woman.

This desire pointed me in the direction of iconic women.

Women who passionately stand for something,
Live their lives as works of art,
And do it with style & substance.

I was on a quest for answers. I devoured their biographies, watched their interviews, studied their presence. In the process, I found some eye opening discoveries.

Here’s the top finding that I uncovered:

There is no formula to being iconic.

It’s an essence that can’t be replicated.

Yet, when I broke down their qualities, I found that each woman possessed different flavors of the same thing.

Confidence, charm, passion, self-worth, femininity, elegance and a passion for life…

Just to name a few….

However, I have great news!

Yet, this “being iconic” is available to us all.

Want some more breaking news?

Every woman has an iconic heart.

That thing that makes her extremely rare and special.

It’s these foundational pieces (charm, femininity, elegance, etc) that all appear in different forms, that allow us to cultivate our own iconic appeal.


(yes, that includes you, madame!)

Want to study some fabulous Iconic Women with me?

Come Join me through a study of some of my favorite Iconic Women.

And when we’re done, you’ll be able to apply what we uncover about these women, so you can begin to cultivate your OWN iconic appeal!

Click Here for Instant access to this Free eBook

Book Cover.jpg

P.S. If you’re as excited as I am to get started, I’d love it if you could please take a moment to celebrate and invite your friends to join you on this study with me.  


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Want to study some fabulous Iconic Women with me? It’s 100% free and FUN.  And you just might learn something about yourself in the process. Go here to register: 


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Ooh la la!  @tonyaleigh is at it again!  Join me on this 4-part series to study Iconic Women (it’s free)  


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A formal study of Iconic Women to Find YOUR Iconic Essence.


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I just signed up to receive this free 4-part eBook that studies Iconic Women, and it’s inspiring me to cultivate my own iconic appeal.  I thought that you might find it interesting.  If so, please go to  to sign up.

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23 Responses to Your Iconic Appeal & Why it Matters

  1. I would say that this is SUCH a gift to all of us in the Holiday Season! Thank you, Tonya!!! I would also highly recommend your course on Becoming a Modern Day Icon to anyone – especially the ladies in the Slim, Chic and Savvy group – it is FABULOUS and I have probably listened to the course at least five times and ALWAYS get a new “gem” out of it – it is truly the gift that keeps on giving!!!

  2. What an exciting prospect. looking forward to more. I love the idea of not hiding anymore. I realise I try and hide books related to this sort of thing for fear people will think I am frivolous, and somehow should read more ‘worthy’ things.
    I would like to be braver about all aspects of myself

    • Hey Rachel! One of my favorite questions to ask is, “So what?” So what if they think you’re frivolous? Tapping into the courage to let people think what they want and following what feels good for you is the hard and beautiful work to lead to your most ICONIC self. xoxo

  3. Thank you so much for sending! I so enjoy getting your emails and listening to your podcasts. This one really hit home for me!

  4. I always regarded iconic women as having an “it” factor that wasn’t available to someone like me. But the more I read from you, Tonya, the more you convince me that it’s not only possible but already there, underneath that false belief. Looking forward to this series and your insights! Thank you!

    • “When you hide from life, life hides from you” I love this! How true for so many of us! Sometimes I feel although there’s a part of me that craves the feeling of fierce independence, self-possession and courageous influence but often I have no idea how to tap into this side of myself. The iconic woman in me is so ready to come out and show the world what she is made of! Thanks for sharing this with us Tonya, I have a feeling it’s a desire that many of us have but lack the guidance and inspiration to make the changes necessary to become so uniquely fabulous. Time to stop hiding ladies!

      • Hey Narelle! That’s exactly why I created this series. My intention is that it will inspire you to stop hiding and share your uniqueness with the world.

        Cheers to being ICONIC!

    • Millie, it absolutely IS there. However, I can so relate to where you are. I felt like that for a long time. I had to clean up my mind and have the courage to BE the woman I deeply desired to be, and it has changed everything. Thank you for your comment!

  5. I adored the Modern Day Icon program (in fact I am going through it again right now!). It’s a deeper dive into living with joie de vivre, sass and style. I highly recommend!

    • Oh Marissa, I absolutely LOVE having you in the community. And, after our night in NYC, I know that you are indeed ICONIC!

  6. Every time I listen to Tonya’s lessons and soiree recordings, I am so inspired ! So much has changed for me since I started seriously considering the woman I wanted to be in situations. What a wonderful gift to accept, that my appeal is my own, that I am adored for it and I embrace it fully.
    Thank you so much Tonya xx

  7. For many years I’ve been in desperate need of some inspiration. And then I found Tonya Leigh and French Kiss Life! Through blogs, Modern Day Icon and Slim, Chic and Savvy, I feel as though I’m surfacing again — and finding my own iconic appeal. Thanks, Tonya!

  8. Just when I was wondering how I’m going to continue to be inspired when I finish the Slim, Chic & Savvy programme you give us the gift of the iconic women series. I may not have reached icon status but life is certainly more elegant – and fun – since I found the FKL community. Thank you Tonya!!

    • Kathryn, you are most welcome. And, I’m going to challenge you on the “not reaching icon status.” Like I said, I think every woman has an iconic heart. Yes, YOU!

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