The Biggest Dream Thief


When I ran my first marathon, it was quite comical how it came to be.

I was driving home from Disney World and, out of nowhere, I had the idea to run the Disney Marathon. Within 15 minutes, I had signed up from my phone.

Keep in mind, I had never run.

And, the thought of 26.2 miles seemed like something that only insane people did. (during the marathon, I saw a guy wearing a sign that said, “26.2 because 26.3 would be crazy.”)

Eight months later, I had completed my first marathon.

When people ask me how I’ve accomplished so much, it’s this mentality that has continually elevated of the quality of my life.

Get an idea. Act on it.

Fast forward to most recently; I had a deja vu moment.

I was at dinner with a friend and we were talking about next year. Sarah, my daughter, graduates from high school this year. I will officially be in the empty nester’s club.

Instead of sitting around and moping (because that would be easy to do, and I’m sure I’ll have my moments), my friend and I were talking about dreams and goals for next year.

I decided that I need something to train for, to occupy my mind in a healthy way. One of the things I’ve always wanted to do is run the marathon in the wine country of Bordeaux. You actually run from vineyard to vineyard tasting wine and eating samples of delicious French food. No consuming power gels or energy bars at this marathon.

Within 10 minutes, I had us on the waiting list. Fingers crossed, we’ll get in.

You see, if I sat around and thought about things too much, my mind would talk me right out of it. Oh, the chatter:

You’re not ready.
This won’t work.
You’re not a runner.
You don’t have time to train.
Your idea sucks.

Ruminating too much on your desires often steals them.

Sure, I have many ideas that never take off. That pause is usually a sign that it’s not the idea for me nor the right time.

But, when I deeply know, I don’t delay.

For the record, this isn’t just with marathons or exercise when I take this attitude of acting on my deep knowing. It happens all over my life: From with my home decorating, dinner party ideas, style experiments, and business ideas.

Waiting around, twisting your thumbs and hoping to ‘manifest a miracle’ is what steals so many dreams.

The miracle requires that you show up.

The best part of showing up is the relationship you develop with yourself. When you follow through on things you say you want, you create a deep, intimate relationship of trust with yourself. As a result, your confidence grows.

These days, I’m about less talking and more doing.

Right now, I know there is something you deeply want to do.

And, it probably won’t feel practical or easy. 

But, doable?


Your dream is waiting for you to show up. {tweet it}

Don’t let yourself block you from doing something that will blow your own mind.

Take action!

Book the trip.
Take the class.
Make the call.
Write a paragraph.
Sign up for the race.

Waiting until “someday” is the biggest thief of dreams.

Are you ready to make a commitment to your dream?

Tell me in the comments one thing you’ll commit to taking action on this week.

With Love,


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10 Responses to The Biggest Dream Thief

  1. Tonya, I adore this post! As an aside, I don’t think I could comfortably drink wine and eat French food in between running in a marathon. However, I am intrigued so look forward to hearing more about it. Hope you get to do this!

    • Pat, I’m not sure I can either…LOL. You can bet I’ll be taking my sweet time, probably more of a saunter than a run :).

  2. Ok, ok, it’s true, I always find clients when I’m out there,exposed. I love body building. This week, I will look at what are the steps to compete.

    I’m over the shame of the flaws of my body, but the thought of competing feels almost ridiculous to me. But I think that’s part of the noise. I’m embarrassed to admit to myself. I love body building and I want to compete. I feel pretentious and its butting heads with my desire.

    I was trained to dance, I was sickly and weak, gave up those dreams. I’m not sickly anymore. I guess that dream hasn’t died. I’m still alive. I’m going for it.

    That was me talking me into myself. Now the whole thought of this sounds thrilling and that’s one of my sweet spot words. Besides what more fun way to build my bio while adoring myself?

    Forget looking into it, I’m plotting my way in, expenses, time, support. There’s gotta be a way.

    • Oh Alex, that noise is just a distraction! I sense that competition is in your future. And, so what if it feels pretentious? Really let yourself go there. What’s underneath that? Almost anything these days can be spun into possibly being ‘pretentious’ but again, I think it’s just fear.

      Send me those competition pics ASAP please!

  3. Hi Tonya! I’m not already sure what my next step will be but I just finished the Modern Day Icon program and I can tell that it really helped me to take action in my life. For example : I booked a trip to New York and it was just amazing. I realized my dream and bought a horse. I launched my own blog. These were very frightening decisions for me at first. Choices and actions are not always easy on a daily basis but it really makes a difference! I can tell you this : you changed my life. Thank you for all the inspiration and support!

  4. I just signed up for a language course where I’ll be chatting with native speakers, to get my Italian rolling again. And this week I commit to taking one step toward putting together a website for my business.

    This article really resonates with me – it’s so true that we are taught in our culture to “think things through,” not make “hasty” decisions, etc. Of course there are times for that, but it’s far less often than I have believed. Time to act! Thanks for the post!

  5. The next logical area for me to tackle is a book about selling, it’s easy, it would make money, and increase my visibility. Yet every time I sit down to make time, I don’t want to do it.

    I want to write a book about life. I want to write a book about watching your husband fight to live after you’ve been married for 13 months. I want to write a book about showing up for your life instead of hiding from it. I want to write a book about being the example for your daughter rather than letting others show her what it’s like to live a life of her dreams. I want to write a book about why I settled for a “fine” life for so long. I want to write a book about “fine isn’t good enough”, not for you, not for me, or our daughters!

    I will make time to begin this process.

    • Hello Tonya, I only started to following you last week when I saw your challenge about choosing your “word” that “word” that inspires your life. Since then, I chose my “word” which is “create”, I listed everything that that word meant to me & who I wanted to be.
      Create in my life means being/doing/having creative moments. Creating great designs,(I am an interior designer), finish writing my book, paint artwork, create my own line of products, creating travel experiences, learning a 3rd language, mentoring other designers so they create their dreams, creating a healthy life (I lost 30 posted last year but this year I stopped going to gym, yoga, etc)…
      Soooo, now that I have my word “CREATE” and my list I Avenue excitement and Flame in my life!
      I am listening to Italian tapes on my 1-1/2 hour drive to work; I got back to gym; started my home spec book to finally finished designing my own home and am mentoring 2 young Designers at work!!!
      All happened in 1 week that you challenged us to find our “word”.
      Thank you

  6. Love this post – must be our time as women – empty nest soon and 60 is next month- along with Alex I love weight training and was a bodybuilder in my 30’s. Nothing changed my body as fast as this. Going back to the gym now. Then I saw a writing course for wild hearts and my long dormant wild heart suddenly woke up. I’ve been burying lost dreams in things like worrying about retirement and not living. See you ladies where your dreams are! Ironically the urges feel like instinct! 💕

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