These 2 Simple Words Will Turn
Your Life into a Grand Romance

Click below if you prefer to listen

Raised in the South, I was taught to always say two simple words to any act of consideration or kindness.

I’m sure you know what they are.

“Thank You.”

Not doing so would have caused me serious trouble (like a backhand).

Growing up, there seemed to be so much to be thankful for.

The beauty of growing up with less is that you’re thankful for the smallest things.

I’ll never forget that one time we stayed at a Motel 6. It had a pool, which was such a big deal to me. It didn’t matter that it was only 4 feet deep and enclosed with a chain linked fence with highway traffic zooming by. I said “Thanks, Daddy,” when he splurged on the $40 room. I was so grateful.

When grownups act like spoiled children.

A “thank you” shouldn’t be just for teaching your kids about good manners.

And it shouldn’t be reserved for only people or extravagant things.

Life, in general, deserves a huge thank you, don’t you think?

Every single day, we are offered gifts that we often take for granted.

We’ve all done it, complaining about things that others would be grateful for.

It has helped me tremendously to have perspective and to call myself out when I’m acting like a spoiled adult.

Here’s what it sounds like:

(and for entertainment value, add whining voice)

I don’t like my job.

I don’t have enough.

I have so much laundry to do.

I don’t like my house.

They get to go there, and I don’t.

She got a promotion, and I didn’t.

I don’t like my body.

It’s not fair that it’s so easy for her.

I don’t have anything to wear.

I don’t make enough money.

Why do I have to live here?

The worst years of my life were when I forgot my manners.

Where I grew up, if you were someone who didn’t say “thanks”, you were considered poorly raised.

That child has no manners.

And that’s a Southern parent’s worst nightmare.

I am not proud to admit that at one point of my adulthood, I forgot my manners.

In fact, I had become that spoiled rotten child my parents feared. I was constantly focused on all that I thought was “wrong” with life and comparing my life to others. I was treating the Universe like an ATM machine with my constant “give me” attitude and then complaining when I didn’t get it.

One of my worst moments was when I became upset that my room service was 30 minutes late.

Oh, I can imagine my mama smacking me good for that one.

In that moment, I started to miss the younger me who was grateful for the little things, the things that I had started to overlook in my adult life.

My attitude was not only keeping me stuck in toxic complaining and comparison, but it was robbing me of the magic of everyday moments that I had forgotten to see.

It was also making it impossible to create what I deeply wanted: joy.

A “thank you” is 1,000 times more powerful than “I hate this.”

We often think we have to hate where we are and resist it to change it.

But this attitude only keeps you stuck with a bad attitude and circumstances that never change.

A grateful heart will attract more into your life than you ever imagined.

When I find myself acting like a spoiled baby about a flight delay, I switch it to how amazing it is that I am able to fly somewhere at 30,000 feet in the air. It took people months to travel that far at one point.

Thank you, life!

Just this morning, I found myself acting a bit spoiled. My daughter called me to tell me she’d had a headache all night. I found myself thinking, “Not again. Why her?”

Then, I thought about the parents of the kids who died in the high school shooting in Florida who will never receive a call from their children again. Suddenly, tears welled up in my eyes.

Thank you, life!

Life is handing you gifts every day. Are you saying thank you?

Imagine if you gave someone a gift, and she complains about it. Wouldn’t you consider that rude?

Yet, that’s what a lot of people are doing with life.

Every day, we wake up and experience so many things to be grateful for. Yet, in a society that’s constantly wanting “more” from a state of “not enough,” we fail to see all the things we already have.

I want you to take a moment and imagine how you’d feel if you really stopped to notice the little treasures in your daily life that you’ve been overlooking. In fact, do it right now. Just look around you and notice all that you do have.

Do you feel that shift?

I’ll tell you how I feel when I say “thank you” to life on a regular basis:

I fall in love with my life as it is right now.

And, do you know what I’ve discovered?

The more you love life, the more it loves you back.
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The reason why my life feels like a grand romance is because of one thing:

I’m often asked how I got to where I am today.

There are many things I could share with you, but, at the core its because…

I stopped acting like a spoiled brat.

I made how I feel today my #1 priority, and gratitude is one of my favorite practices to shift my state of being in a skinny minute.

I stopped complaining, blaming and waiting.

I quit the whole “my life will be better one day when” attitude and started appreciating the life I have.

If you feel like you’ve been behaving like a spoiled adult, you’re not alone. We all have. Please don’t beat yourself up. That’s just a different flavor of the same problem.

Instead, I want to challenge you to turn it around.

You ready?

Your 7 Day “Thank You” Challenge (a.k.a The Daily Practice that changed my life).

I have a friend who is grateful for everything.

I could give her a single sock, and she’d gush for hours.

She’s lovely to be around because, in her presence, I feel like that kid again who realized how much there is to be grateful for.

Years ago, she inspired me to start a “thank you” practice where I say thank you to the simplest of moments. Sometimes, I say it out loud. Sometimes, it’s an internal prayer.

But, what I know is that my life has changed dramatically because of this practice.

Do you want to change your life, too?

I challenge you to try the 7 day “Thank You” Challenge.
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Here are some ways I have practiced this in my own life:

I’ve learned to say thank you for things that I used to overlook (or complain about).

Here are some examples:

“Thank you” for the everyday miracles that I once took for granted:

Food on my table.
A sunrise and sunset.
Waking up and taking a breath.
The beautiful trees outside my bedroom window.
The ability to see, smell, feel, hear and taste.
My body that allows me to experience life.
Running water that allows me to take a warm shower.

“Thank you” for the things I wanted and now have:

My daughter.
A man I adore.
My dogs.
A fabulous team.
My computer.
My business.
Loving parents.
A home.

“Thank you” for the things I get to experience:

Hikes on a spring day.
Cooking dinner.
Writing about things I’m passionate about.
Meeting up with friends.
Loving others.

“Thank you” for things that I used to complain about:

Washing the dishes: I am so grateful that I have these gorgeous dishes to wash.

Folding the laundry: Doesn’t this basket of clean laundry that I get to fold smell absolutely amazing?

Taking out the trash: How lucky am I that the trash man comes all the way to my house to pick up our garbage every week.

Paying the bills: I love the sense of responsibility that paying bills on time gives me. And I know deep in my heart that money flows in and out of my life when I’m living in a state of gratitude.

Cleaning up dog poop: My dog gives me so much joy. I know that if the roles were reversed he’d totally do this for me!

My Body: I love every unique part of my body – as it makes me uniquely ME – and without it, I wouldn’t be who I am, and I love me! My body allows me to walk, run & dance. It carries me through this experience of life. I thank it all day every day.

This attitude of “thank you” doesn’t just stop with what I presently have or experience. Just like blessing my meal before eating, I like to bless my future with gratitude.

“Thank you” ahead of time for things I’ve yet to experience but am excited for:

Creating more in-person experiences for the French Kiss Life community.
My daughter’s improving health.
More belly laugh connection with friends.
More travel to exotic lands.
Publishing a book.

When we give thanks rather than complain, our life starts to feel like a grand romance.

Here’s what I believe:

It’s human nature to want more, and I think it’s a beautiful thing. But, if you can’t appreciate what you already have, why do you deserve more?

Wanting from a place of abundance and joy is a different experience.

And, a woman in love is a magical creature, don’t you think?

Lucky for us, there’s always something to be thankful for.

This is what French Kissing Life is all about.


JOIN THE CHIC CONVERSATION: Let’s start your 7 Day “Thank you” challenge right now! Look around where you are in this moment. Share in the comments something you want to say “thank you” for.

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37 Responses to These 2 Simple Words Will Turn
Your Life into a Grand Romance

  1. This is so true, Tonya! You got me at a weak moment, and now I’m smiling with true joy. I love how you broke out your thank you’s into categories, too. I will add this into my journaling practice and am joining the 7 day challenge! and beyond! LOVE you!

    • Tonya, ever since I realized my parents never thanked me for doing my chores, I have thanked anyone who does something for me. I didn’t have to teach it to my kids as they picked up on it as it was so normal to do. My husband didn’t always thank me for cleaning up the kitchen after he cooks but now he does. And for lots of other things.

  2. Thank you for my warm bed and the two beautiful dogs fast asleep on their beds.
    Thank you for my wonderful daughter and sister

    And Thank you Tonya, for the reminder to appreciate what I have

  3. Thank you for my two wonderful daughters.

    Thank you for the wonderful man in my life who treats me with love and respect every single day, and he makes me laugh!

    Thank you for my lovely home.

    Thank you for the beautiful white roses I bought today!

    Thank you, Tonya.

  4. Needed this so much today! I just returned from vacation and was feeling down about having to return to work Monday – instead of feeling grateful not only to have more than enough money to travel for a week, but for the job that allows me to do so in so many ways, I cursed that job as I flew home. Not very chic! You are a gem Tonya!

  5. Going through a rough financial time of my life, and i am trying not to have fear. I drove by homeless people today, and felt sad, I am grateful I have a home to come home to, and food to eat, and a computer to go on to and clothes to wear, that are not the same that I slept in. I am richer then many, and I have the ability and opportunity to continue to increase my business and therefore not have to go through a rough time, Many dont have the ability or opportunity

    • Perspective is everything! We can always find those with a lot more or a lot less. I find it best to simply focus on all that I do have. Sending you love. You can turn around financial situations. xoxo

  6. Thank You God, for my kittehs, washer and dryer, grandson Spud, the Internet, my Visiting Nurse (who has become a friend), my home, my car, health insurance, the Wound Care Center that’s helping me heal my legs, my books, my essential oils and so much more.

  7. I am thankful for the teddy bear I got for Christmas with the Amazon gift card from my parents. As a teen I collected teddy bears. Their snuggliness was a great comfort during those emotional years! I haven’t had one since then. I am now 49. I haven’t outgrown them! My mom told me when she saw a gift card that game with a teddy bear she had to get it because she remembered how much I loved them 😅 Thank you mom and dad for reminding me that comfort can come in small cuddly things!

  8. I’m so happy to read this as the universe is trying to tell me the same thing right now and it affirms I need to practice thankfulness… I just bought a plaque to put in my bedroom that says I still remember the days I prayed for what I have now…again a reminder to be thankful…..Thank you

  9. I’m thankful for spending the day with my Godchild. And being able to take a walk outside because it is sunny and beautiful. Thank you for this quality time and a beautiful day!

    • I am thankful I found this today. I have been spiraling into a world of negativity recently where I am not happy with anything including myself. I am excited to begin your 7 day challenge! I feel better already just thinking of the things I have to be thankful for!!

  10. Thank you for the gorgeous sunrise this morning! I was driving directly into the sun this morning on my way to work and it truly made me smile and feel happy!!

  11. I am so thankful for a roof over my head, clothing on my body, a job that I enjoy, my family who I love and who love me, an amazing therapist, I am thankful for my amazing life! (and so very thankful to you, Tonya for always providing quality posts with gentle reminders of how to live well!)

  12. Thank you– these are two words with so much power to shift my attitude. As I read through your post I thought, uh-oh , that’s me! Thank you Tonya, and thank you to all the ladies willing to take the thank you challenge. I’m grateful for this group!

  13. Two very important words. This came at the perfect time. My job can get to me sometimes, this reminds me to be thankful for the job. It pays bills, puts food othe table and a roof over my head.

  14. Dear Tonya, I loved your article and it came on time. Last week I was on vacation. I gave a lot of thought to this decision because I don’t go on vacation before August. However I had a burnout for the first time in my life and this trip suddenly became a matter of necessity. It was an amazing week! The nature, the views, the food, the experiences, all the people I met. Everything and everybody was fantastic! (By the way, since you travel in France, Baden Baden, Germany is very close to Strasbourg and it’s worth visiting). I had an overdose of joy and I can’t remember how many times I lifted my eyes to the sky and said “thank you”. The funny part of the story; Last day before coming back to Athens I caught a cold! Of course I didn’t blame the Universe/God/fate for ruining my last day in Baden, instead I laughed out loud (and still laughing) because I realised that I was not used to experience so much joy in the past and for the first time it was so extreme that I couldn’t handle it. Of course I’m still thankful for those wonderful days there but also for these I spend now at home (with lots of vitamins and cups of tea, thankful for these too) because I have something good to remember and tell and also a good reason to see inside me and think again about dealing with joy (in a positive way)…
    You ‘re always an inspiration for me and Thank You so much for this! Lots of love from Greece.

    • Im going through a lot..starting a divorce😥I feel really down. Right now, im greatful for 7 hours of sleep, eating a healthy meal and God for walking me through it. Thank U Tonya.

  15. I want to say thank you for my wonderful daughter and the best Momma ever! I was also raised in the south and would have received the back hand also if I didn’t say Thank You. I had it instilled in me to have respect and to be grateful for the things that I did have at the moment.

  16. Argh! I WANT to be thankful for my friend Ethan with whom I constantly argue and am always angry, who I also blocked today, but I’m still struggling with that one. Help! An easier one is to be thankful for my new bunny, who has no bottom teeth and may require a lot of veterinary care. I’m thankful because he’s wonderful, I love nursing bunnies, and because I come from an animal-loving family. And thank you, Tonya, for helping me decide to bring him home.

  17. Thank you for this lovely article! It is a joy to wake up and be thankful to experience another day, pain free and to do whatever I decide to do! A far cry from 2013 when I was a co-partner in a manufacturing company,in a toxic workplace with toxic negative people who lied, stole and was dishonest to me, which eventually led to being diagnosed with advanced RA. I am thankful that I can eat and drink healthy, nutritious foods which helps my body to recover! I am thankful that I discovered the winsome Tonya and FKL !

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